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| If you squint and cock your head, it kind of looks like The Joker's mouth. |
This is my left arm. If you look closely you'll see theres a small scar there. Right of the collarbone, above the elbow. See it? Yeah, the one that looks like something inflicted by Leatherface. I got it on my trip to India when they replaced my shoulder with a hunk of metal that drives airport security crazy and thus has probably put an end to my prospective career as a drug mule. Or a shoulder model (wetsuit modeling could still be in the cards).
The little red dots running across it are there because rather than use stitches like sane people, they literally stapled the wound shut with a freaking staplegun. They even removed them with one of those clicky staple remover things- no anesthetic though. Classic India.
A lot of the time I forget it's there, and then I take my jacket off and get the weirdest looks- silver lining though, it has stopped guys looking down my shirt.
Anyway, my long term plan is to let it fade a little so it looks less 'surgical'; and then think up a really epic story to explain it to people- possibly involving heroic sword fighting or being mauled by a one-clawed cougar while saving a baby from a burning zoo. If anyone has any good suggestions, I'm listening.
Its where one hell of a massive evil and/or poisonous centipede attacked you/mated with your armpit.
ReplyDeleteYou either fought it off with a kitchen knife and eventually ate it as is your right as the victor, or you subdued it and now it rests inside your bosom to protect you from roving hands and/or eyes of pervy dudes.
Either is believable enough to be true.