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Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Shit White Girls Say to Jews


Inspired by Shit White Girls Say, Shit Asian Girls say, and Shit White Girls Say to Brown Girls; here's my list of Shit White Girls Say to Jewish Girls.
I was the only Jewish* kid at my school growing up, and all of these are things people have actually said to me.

You’re Jewish? You don’t have a Jew nose.
What do you call a Jewish church?
Do you have to wear those little hats?
You’re really pretty, you don’t even look Jewish
Are you going to go live in one of those farm things in Israel?
Omg I shouldn’t have mentioned Hitler I’m SO SORRY
Do you like, HATE Germans?
Do you like, HATE Mel Gibson?
Do you like, LOVE Schindler’s list?
Doing this essay on WWII must be really emotional for you.
Is there a Jewish Jesus?
I’ve seen you eat bacon.
Why didn’t your people go to work on 9/11?*
It’s not racist. Jewish isn’t a race. Wait, is it???
BORAT IS SO FUNNY. Throw the Jew in the well. Hahaha.
Can I see your menorah?

*I'm an enthusiastic atheist, but I went to Hebrew school for the first 13 years of my life, two thirds of my family identify as religious(if very liberal) Jews and I identify as being Jewish culturally.
**A girl in my class said that to me on 10/11, in front of the whole class. She didn't get in trouble. I did, however, get in trouble for calling her a dumb bitch. I was an awesome 11 year old.

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